maandag, september 10, 2007

In the spotlight: Stock, Aitken & Waterman

Vanaf het midden van de jaren tachtig brachten Mike Stock, Matt Aitken en Peter Waterman een belachelijke hoeveelheid hits uit. Het begon nog tamelijk origineel met artiesten als Princess (Say I’m Your Numer One) en Dead or Alive (You Spin Me Round), maar al snel ontdekte het trio een gouden hitformule. Het gevolg was dat pophits jarenlang precies hetzelfde klonken. Midden jaren negentig was de koek op. De heren produceren nog steeds – zij het niet meer als trio. Hieronder een selectie van hoogte- en dieptepunten uit de Hit Factory van SA&W.

Gayle and Gillian - All Mixed Up
Wat Kylie & Jason kunnen, kunnen wij ook, dachten Gayle & Gillian. De tweeling was bekend van de soap Neighbours en probeerde het met dit liedje. Het ging het ene oor in, of eigenlijk dat niet eens. Voordat ze bekend werden waren ze alweer vergeten.


Brilliant - It's A Man's Man's Man’s World
Brilliant kwam voort uit het doemerige Killing Joke en scoorde in 1985 een bescheiden hit met dit nummer. Later richtte een van de leden het radicale The KLF op, dat hits scoorde als Last Train To Trancentral. Toch grappig om te zien hoe ze in de periode tussen Killing Joke en KLF in zoiets ontzettend sufs wisten neer te zetten.


Kylie & Jason - Especially for you (Royal Variety 1989)
Lang voordat Kylie haar suikerzoete imago inruilde voor een volwassen, sexy look (die later fijnzinnig werd platgespoten met liters botox), deed ze het met Jason Donovan. Dat het er klef aan toeging blijkt uit deze draak van een ballad. Het werd een enorme hit en zowel Kylie als Jason stonden daarna regelmatig in de hitlijsten. Na een paar moeilijke jaren kwam Kylie terug als popprinses. Jason verloor zijn haren en de hits bleven uit. Sporadisch staat hij nog op het toneel en in musicals.


Big Fun & Sonia - You've Got A Friend
De drie gladjakkers van Big Fun scoorden in Nederland met een verkrachte versie van Blame it on the Boogie. Dit is een charity-single waarvoor het roodharige trolletje Sonia (You’ll Never Stop Me From Loving You) mocht komen opdraven. Zet een teiltje naast je toetsenbord en huiver. Of draai het geluid weg.


Michael Davidson - Turn it Up
Hoe kan het dat Rick Astley wereldberoemd wordt en dit lekkere hapje – dat exact dezelfde muziek maakt – niet? Turn It Up is van de soundtrack van Madonna’s Who’s That Girl geplukt. Michael Davidson had ongetwijfeld gehoopt op een internationale doorbraak, maar helaas voor hem flopte de film jammerlijk. En zo ook zijn carriere als zanger. Waar is Michael gebleven? En zou dat strakke witte shirt hem nog steeds zo fantastisch staan?


Sabrina - All of Me
Vergeet Britney, Lindsay of Paris: sletteriger dan Sabrina krijg je ze niet. Ooit droeg Sabrina een hotpants die zo klein was dat je haar konthaar kon zien zitten. Dat hebben we Britney nog niet zien doen (maar dat komt omdat zij nou eenmaal alles netjes scheert natuurlijk). Sabrina stak in de jaren tachtig de al even hoerige Samantha Fox naar de kroon. Inmiddels is Sabrina kleding gaan dragen en pakt ze de zaken serieuzer aan. En zingen kan ze nu ook echt.


Reynolds Girls on Most Annoying Pop Songs Ever
I’d Rather Jack than Fleetwood Mac. Oftewel: ik masturbeer liever dan naar ouwelullenmuziek te luisteren. Was je nog niet gay, dan word je dat meteen door de gedachte aan deze twee onooglijk lelijke meisjes die zichzelf liggen te vingeren. Let op het vileine commentaar in dit fragment uit het vermaarde BBC-programma.


Kakko - We Should Be Dancing
Vanuit Japan kwam Yamagata Kakuko naar Engeland om een muziekopleiding te volgen. Niet dat dat nodig was om een singletje als dit op te nemen, maar goed... Kakko kwam maar liefst tot plaats 101 in de Britse hitparade met het lied. Daarna deed ze nog een vruchteloze poging met What Kind of Fool. Toen dat ook flopte vloog ze razendsnel terug naar Japan. Daar is ze inmiddels een gevierd soapactrice.


Carol Hitchcock - Get Ready
Met haar kale kop en twee oren vol piercings is Carol Hitchcok zo’n beetje de Anti-kylie. Haar coverversie van de Temptations werd een klein hitje in thuisland Australie, maar de rest van de wereld moest weinig hebben van enge Carol.


Alyssa Milano - Look In My Heart
Behalve acteren in Who’s The Boss had Alyssa Milano een andere carriere. Met name in Japan waren de platen van Alyssa niet aan te slepen. Ze scoorde er hit na hit en ook de bemoeienissen van Stock, Aitken en Waterman zorgden voor succes. In Japan dan, want in Nederland en de rest van Europa lieten we Alyssa-de-zangeres compleet links liggen.


Mandy Smith - Boys and Girls
Ze was de droom van iedere pedofiel toen ze op haar dertiende verkering kreeg met de toen 47-jarige Rolling Stones-bassist Bill Wyman. Mandy Smith werd wereldberoemd en wat doe je dan: je neemt een plaatje op. I Just Can’t Wait (ging dat over Bill?) werd een hit in Engeland, net als dit niemendalletje. O ja, toen Mandy achttien was trouwde ze met Bill, om twee jaar later weer te scheiden. Ook leuk om te vermelden: ten tijde van hun relatie had de zoon van Bill iets met de moeder van Mandy.


Dead Or Alive - I'll Save You All My Kisses
Als je Pete Burns tegenwoordig ziet herken je hem nauwelijks: het is Amanda Lepore met ballen. In de SA&W-periode hield Burns het op een lycra legging met een prachtig kruismedaillon, zoals te zien is in deze video. Homo-erotisch? Nou nee. Maar de achtergrond-dansers des te meer.


Cliff Richard – Stronger Than That
Good old Cliff probeerde eind jaren tachtig wanhopig met de tijd mee te gaan. Hij trok twee keer aan de bel bij SA&W, met als resultaat de singles I Just Don’t Have the Heart en dit lied. Let op de 1990-kleding van de dansers in de clip: fouter bestaat bijna niet. Overigens doet Cliff zelf ook een stramme poging tot bewegen, wat vooral lachwekkend overkomt.


Debbie Harry - In Love With Love
Ja ja, zelfs de queen of punk moet eraan geloven. Als haar soloplaten minder scoren dan haar oudere werk met Blondie, vindt Debbie dat natuurlijk niet leuk. Ze wilde een hit, maar ook SA&W konden haar er niet aan helpen. In de low-budget video zien we Debbie een beetje verdwaasd door een decor met Egyptische tekens lopen. Ze lijkt totaal niet door te hebben hoe ze hier ineens verzeild is geraakt. Arme, arme Debbie...


Bananarama - Last Thing On My Mind
Stock, Aitken en Waterman zijn meesters in het recyclen van ouwe meuk. Zo scoorde Kylie een hit met Mandy Smith’s Got To Be Certain en maakte ze goede sier met Hazel Dean’s Turn it Into Love. De restanten van Bananarama deden begin jaren negentig een comebackpoging met dit nummer, dat we natuurlijk veel beter kennen in de latere versie van Steps.


Jason Donovan - Hang On To Your Love
Sommigen vonden hem een watje, maar wat was Jason lekker in deze video. Half ontbloot of in een sexy tanktop en een superstrakke jeans: buk nog een keer Jason! Lang gingen er geruchten dat Jason homo was, maar toen het Britse tijdschrift The Face hierover berichtte, klaagde Jason het blad aan. Het gevolg was dat The Face bijna failliet ging. Jaren later maakte hij het goed, met een sexy fotoshoot. Maar het lekkere was er toen alweer vanaf.


Mel & Kim - Megamix 90' Video
Twee zusjes, gekke hoedjes, simpele dansjes. Dat gekoppeld aan simpele upbeat liedjes als Showing Out en Respectable leverde een succesformule op. Helaas was die van korte duur, want Mel bezweek aan de gevolgen van kanker. Kim ging daarna solo en scoorde hits met Don’t Worry en G.L.A.D. Ze zingt nog steeds, maar de platen die ze uitbrengt hebben nauwelijks nog succes.

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